Is It Your Opinion or Theirs That Counts?

Whether you’re a physique athlete, body builder, fitness competitor or just working on chiseling down for the beach you have, in large part placed the fate of your success in the opinion palm of someone else’s hand.

Like it or not, once you’ve stepped into the public eye or worse yet slapped on the last coat of pro tan, basted yourself in Pam spray and stepped on stage in front of a panel of judges, you have relinquished the power of decision to someone else.  What happens next is no longer up to you.

Your opinion at this point means very little if anything at all.

In fact, research in the area of social psychology based on Yerkes Dodson’s Law, Theory of Social Facilitation would suggest – and here’s a brain twister for you – “when it comes to your performance your opinion about other people’s opinion of you may matter more than your own opinion of yourself.”

Yeah, I know…

Here’s what it means.  Social Facilitation is the tendency for people to do better when in the presence of or being observed by other people.  On the flip side, there is also Social Inhibition which is the tendency to do worse when in the presence of or being observed by other people.

One of the key influencers of Social Facilitation and/or Inhibition from my personal experience, is whether or not, you as the observed have formed the opinion that the observers (judges/audience) are supportive or critical of our performance or believe they think you’re awesome or suck.

Whether we like to admit it or not – their opinion matters to us! And since we don’t know their opinion – we form one for them.

As a human being and therefore a “social creature” the chances are, like most of us, at one level or another you have been forming your personal opinions, including opinions about yourself good or bad, based although not exclusively, on the influences and opinions of others.

This, in a long career of painful lessons is exactly what spawned one of my most stinging and valuable.

I was in the early stages of a budding body building career and had already racked up several fairly impressive victories and respectable placings in some high profile prestigious competitions when I made a classic tactical error.  I allowed myself to be influenced by opinions other than my own.

“You look freaking amazing, bro…”

… you’re ready, bro” – go collect your trophy, bro” was what I was hearing, in spite of the fact that I was in off season shape, from my immediate gym tribe which included some very successful and more importantly (at the time) “freaking cool” athletes .

And as a result, when I looked in the mirror, I was convinced I was seeing something that simply was not there – a competition ready physique.

-Watch the Full Max Mind Set video “Brocebo Illusion” –

Borrowing from a recent post on SuppVersityby Pro. Dr. Andro “Natural Anabolics – Brocebo effect”  about the impact of placebos on athletic performance, especially when endorsed by a pro or a bro, I now call this the “Brocebo” (bro-cebo) effect.

And like the classic performance enhancing  effect a simple sugar pill (placebo) can have even on a seasoned pro, I was psychologically pumped up by what I was hearing because it was what I wanted to believe to be true.

BIG MISTAKE

And before I knew it, I found myself on stage at an important stepping stone competition, pale, unprepared and most influentially – of the opinion that “the audience and the judges must think I suck.”

Unlike the actual placebo effect however, which in proven cases can actually enhance performance with little if any negative aftermath – the impact of buying into the “Brocebo Effect” was for me both demoralizing and humiliating. 

I learned the hard way that basing your actions solely on the opinions of your overzealous “bros, tribe, or homeys” can not only induce false confidence but can actually be a very powerful covert foe to your success. Perhaps we should re-name it the “Foecebo Effect.”

But why would we let this crap happen in the first place? After all we have our own mirror and our own opinions, don’t we?

We Are Social Creatures

As social creators we all place a great deal of value on the opinions of others. And if you’re physique competitors, you perhaps to a greater degree than most, are subject to outside social influence and other people’s opinions…in many respects it’s what we seek.  Add to that, the fact that we all want to believe the best about ourselves – when we hear “you’re awesome bro…” from people we trust or look up to we unconsciously begin to form a similar favorable opinion – accurate or not.

And although it’s good to have friends (bros) around who are encouraging and supportive (you wouldn’t want the opposite) keep in mind that their fondness for you will likely bias their opinion.

Here are three social influence rules that can keep you from swallowing the brocebo pill and help you avoid Social Inhibition when stepping on stage or into the relatively public eye of your local beach.

1. Seek the critical eye of a coach, mentor or honest critic who will give it to you straight.  If you surround yourself with a posse of yes-men, suck ups or Brocebos you will never get an honest unbiased (all be it sometimes painful) critique.
2. A swollen head (ego) will always find plenty of helium to fill it. Keep yourself grounded in confident humility by adapting a beginner’s mind set – meaning, seek constant learning in the pursuit of mastery. The moment you feel like you have become the master is the moment you should be bracing for a painfully humbling experience.
3. Judge harshly and you shall be judged harshly.  When you sit back as the critic and judge others harshly or form and express unfavorable, unkind or just plain mean opinions of others you are sending a message to your unconscious mind that “people are judging you in the same harsh unforgiving way.” These unconscious beliefs will way heavy on your ability to perform at your best on stage or in any social or business setting.  Be kind, compassionate, honest and professional when judging others and your unconscious will get the message that others are there to support and reward you for your hard work, diligence and courage… and you will be setting in motion the process of Social Facilitation.

Make sure you register for my upcoming FREE “Unleash Your Ambition Machine”webnar

 

See you in the winner’s circle

Tom

For more Mind Set, Motivation and Achievement Tools and Strategies go to TomTerwilliger.com